When it comes to writing I have been a procrastinator my whole life. From the Western Civilizations paper in high school to the take home final for an arts in education class a few years ago, I can’t churn the work out. It’s not that I don’t enjoy writing, in fact I’m really quite fond of it, but when I set out on assignment, I am always waiting for that elusive divine spark of inspiration… that flash of brilliance that will make the essay poignant, memorable, and worth the reader’s…

This is Caramel. She’s a 16 year old female Calico cat that has been in my life since 1995. I brought her home from the Animal Protective League in Cleveland while I was in my second to last year of nursing school. She was 7 months old and feisty.

Caramel has lived with me in a total of five different apartments since I graduated college. She consoled me through the end of a relationship, encouraged me with her approving meows into a new one, and she moved to New York with…

One of our participants has had a very ill daughter for many years. Over the years, her daughter has visited us at the center, enjoyed our entertainment, and always admired the jewelry that her mother made here. Our participant loves jewelry making and has made many necklaces for her daughter. It’s been so therapeutic for her to get involved in these art projects during these difficult years, and it was especially important to her to be able to give her daughter these gifts.

Sadly last week, her daughter passed away. She…

Prior to the June 22 episode of “Deadliest Catch,” I had, if you’ll pardon the pun, never caught an episode. When I heard in February that the captain of one of the crab boats had a stroke and subsequently died a couple of weeks later, I wondered how and if it would be handled on the show. I was drawn to the episode, the first in a four-episode-arc that promises to show the struggles of Captain Harris’ family, for one simple reason — as Clark Bunting, the president and general…

Early each morning I enjoy a cup of coffee and listen to the news on WQXR radio. Recently two items struck me. The first was the lead news story on military and civilian deaths resulting from the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan. The second was an advertisement for a skin cream designed to make the user appear 10 years younger. Both items suggested to me that we are a death-denying culture. Living in such a culture has profound ramifications on the grieving and on those who journey with them.

In a…

(photo by John Morgan)

Time heals. It’s been nearly two months since my father’s sudden passing and I am so proud of my mom for all of her strength through this process of loss. When I wrote about her struggle with her new role as widow in my last entry, I wasn’t sure how things would turn out. She lives in Ohio, I live in New York. I graciously accepted the task of making sure that although we are miles apart I will always available to her for support through frequent…

(Photo by Michael Barkowski)

Life changes fast. Life changes in the instant. You sit down to dinner and life as you know it ends. The question of self-pity.

Those are the opening sentences in Joan Didion’s book, “The Year Of Magical Thinking“, winner of a National Book Award. It tells the story of the author’s journey with grief and loss after the sudden death of her husband in 2003.

Ms. Didion’s story and her process of grief very closely resembles my mom’s experience. My mom lost her husband, my father, in a similar manner…

I spent much of Presidents’ Day night on the web searching for blog ideas. Not to worry, I was not neglecting other responsibilities. My husband was at his Pilates class and I was taping 24.

My original thought was to write about Patrick Kennedy choosing not to run for re-election. He is still mourning his father (who was a hospice patient), and he himself has battled depression, bipolar disorder, and substance abuse. I attended a great VNSNY workshop on “Addiction and Recovery in Grief” and was fascinated to learn that people…

I had a dear patient once, my first, who wanted to tell me what it felt like to die. She had dozens of friends, but no siblings, no husband, and no children. She had been married—once in her 50s for about a year—but she divorced her husband because “he couldn’t stand being married to a smart woman.”  She was surrounded by people who loved her, but there was no one in her life with whom she could reveal such intimate thoughts.

Every day was a struggle. She would wake up, acknowledge…

"Ribbons" created by Effie Wilson

My father-in-law’s wife has dementia. There is no easier way to say it. As a nurse, I want to do all I can to help, but what makes it difficult for me and my husband is the fact that they live in Arizona, and we can’t “drop in” to help. It seems as though it was only yesterday when we visited and were in the “sewing” room discussing her doll collection and the dolls she herself had created along with her plans to sell them on line. She then…